Failure

funny picture... not so funny feeling.

-when your formulation sucks, after you've spent 1000 bones of company money on a trip to make it work.
-when your girlfriend has had a great day until she sees you.
-when you've smoked a cigarette and didn't want to.
-when you've huffed and puffed your way through exams, for a tiny little payoff.
-when your literary journal can't quite get finished.
-when you're alienated from your roomies, family, and friends, wondering if they think your an unholy outcast.
-when you can't pay the bills on time.
-when you've given the Lord far too little time.


I had a dream last night that I was writing, frantically, like a scribe or something in all of these different places and all of these different people were standing over my shoulder shaking their heads, people I loved, teachers, the pope, and it didn't make me feel very good like I was trying hard but not doing a good job and my work was never good enough.